The Forgotten Population: Autistic Adults and the Stigma to Grow Up Autism

The Forgotten Population: Autistic Adults and the Stigma to Grow Up

Autism spectrum disorder (ASD) is a developmental delay that impacts the way these

individuals think, process and communicate. Adults on the autism spectrum are stigmatized

based on the ways that society perceives them in a negative manner due to these differences. The

stigmatized attribute of self is an individual’s characteristic which is perceived negatively in a

particular culture or society. Stigmatized attributes often lead to marginalization which impact

the individual’s life, relationships, health, opportunities and social status. The impact of stigma

often reaches beyond the individual into their relationship and networks or communities which

makes it difficult to quantify exactly how many members of the population are impacted. Stigma

is most common among marginalized groups such as people of color, disabled folks, people with

mental or physical illness and gender. Goffman defines stigma as a “discrediting attribute that

reduces an individual from a usual person to a tainted one” (Goffman 1963: 1). Stigma has the

power to mark individuals as tainted and therefore allow negative perceptions from others. An

example of this is Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD, autism) which can be described by Goffman

as a character blemish based on the ways that allistic (non-autistic) people perceive those on the

autism spectrum. Over time, society has become more aware of and tolerant of autism but

oftentimes this tolerance is primarily directed towards children. However, children with autism

grow into adults with autism. When this transition happens, individuals become further

stigmatized as they are expected to simply “grow up” and follow social norms. Traits of autism

in adults lead to stigmatization for adults and often create barriers to opportunities in a

neurotypical society.

Stigma Theory

Erving Goffman’s piece on “Stigma and Social Identity” provides a nuanced explanation

of stigma that builds upon his work around social identity. In short, Goffman describes stigma as

the associated “disgrace” of difference among members of society (Goffman 1963: 1). Stigma

theory provides justification for the ways that some people might justify their rationalization of

attaching stigma to those who are different or discredited in comparison to social standards.

Goffman states that “the term stigma, then, will be used to refer to an attribute that is deeply

discrediting…” (Goffman 1963: 2). The three types of stigma are abomination of the body,

blemish of character and tribal stigma (Goffman 1963: 2). The stigma and perception of autism

in adults is an example of abomination of the body and blemish of character. Abomination of the

body is a type of stigma which relates to one’s physical deformities or differences. Blemish of

character is a type of stigma related to the perception of one’s character to be “weak, unnatural,

rigid or dishonest” (Goffman 1963: 2). These types of stigma are all defined by their ability to

discredit a person’s social identity in the ways that it diminishes the individual’s perceived worth,

value, or legitimacy within a particular social context. Lastly, Goffman explains the dichotomy

between normals and those who have been stigmatized. Normals are those “who do not depart

negatively from the particular expectations” and are opposite to stigmatized folks. Goffman

describes “mixed contacts” as “the moments when stigmatized and normals are in the same

‘social situation’” (Goffman 1963: 7). These social situations can be intentional interactions or

they can be unintentional interactions in which the stigmatized and normal happen to be in the

same place. These interactions often have more “consequences” for the stigmatized but prefer to

be avoided by both parties to protect themselves from discomfort.

Case Examples

There are common cases for adults with autism including myself and others shown in the

media. As an autistic adult, I will use myself as a primary case study regarding stigma. I am a 27

year old, white, queer, female who was diagnosed with autism in my early 20s. In my lifetime, I

have experienced stigma particularly as an autistic adult based on the ways that I interact with

myself and others. I will be able to analyze my experiences along with my observations of others

in relation to me to create a full picture about the stigma of autistic adults. Second, I will be

using the television show on Netflix called Love on the Spectrum (O’Cleary: 2022). This show is

a documentary-style series in which individuals on the spectrum attempt to find love. Some

individuals date neurotypical partners while others date similar neurodivergent partners. The

show allows for observation of interactions, reactions as well as debriefing interviews. I will

primarily focus on two cast members, Kaelynn who is a 26 year old white, female with lower

support needs who is going on dates with neurotypical men and explains many of her

experiences in the series and on social media. The show also highlights the stigma towards her

disability from potential neurotypical suitors. I will also focus on another contestant named

James who is a 34 year old white male cast member who presents with complex communication

needs. His experience on the show highlights the stigma towards autistic adults in their

interactions with dating and building relationships, even with other autistic folks.

Analysis of The Stigma of Adult Autism

Autism in adults is stigmatized in our society which expects adults to take care of

themselves, work and find success in ways that are typically more complicated for autistic folks.

American ideology related to meritocracy often leaves out disabled adults as they may need more

resources to succeed. Adults are expected to communicate well with each other and people on

the autism spectrum often struggle with verbal communication and understanding social cues

which leads them to be perceived as lacking intelligence. This perception often ties in with the

infantilization of autistic adults as their non-autistic peers expect them to behave in the way they

assume adults should. Autistic adults often struggle with sensory processing related to lights,

sounds and touch. For example, an autistic adult may feel overwhelmed in a grocery store with

bright lights, music, people, carts, etc. and need to self-soothe with noise canceling headphones

or stimming behavior like hand flapping or rocking. These accommodations often cause autistic

adults to be stigmatized as not paying attention, being perceived as crazy for involuntary

stimming behavior which leads to others thinking they cannot take care of themselves in public.

However, these accommodations support the autistic person to be able to do independent tasks

and allows them to live their life as they wish to.

Autism in adults would be considered a blemish of character due to these traits being

perceived as abnormal or antisocial behaviors.The blemish of character stigma is prevalent for

autistic adults in the way that they do not meet the behavioral expectations in a neurotypical

society and are often perceived as “weak”, “domineering” or “rigid” (Goffman 1963: 2). For

example, in my own life, I have been stigmatized for my struggles with communication. As a

late diagnosed autistic person, I went through my teenage years with immense struggles to

communicate and express myself with my mother. We often fought and I would have autistic

meltdowns and shutdowns which include screaming, throwing things and sobbing. At the time,

my mother assumed that I was a “normal” teenager and stigmatized these reactions by expressing

her disappointment that I didn’t act like a “normal” teenager and referred to these meltdowns as

“tantrums” which was infantilization. This example providers evidence for how stigma theory is

prevalent regarding the expectations of “normal” development for autistic teens and adults. Now,

I know how to recognize when I might have a meltdown and take steps to prevent them from

becoming harmful, but before my diagnosis I was left being stigmatized for my harmful

behavior. This is an example of how be behavior was stigmatized as a blemish of character

compared to the expectation of a “normal” teenager.

Autistic adults often encounter scenarios in daily life where they must interact with

neurotypical members of society. Goffman explains this experience as “mixed contacts” which is

the social interactions between normals and stigmatized individuals. For example, an autistic

adult in a social interaction with neurotypical adults. The behavior from both parties often

depends on the type of interaction, the obvious nature of the neurodivergence or the disclosure of

it. For example, I often struggle with the interactions on campus when taking in person classes

because I have not disclosed my neurodivergence to classmates in the ways that I have with

friends and family. When a professor asks students to join in pairs or small groups, I often panic

and try to “mask” to hide my autism and get through the assignment. I notice that I tend to get

nervous and quiet which causes other students to take more leadership in the group we are in.

Another example of mixed contacts is from Netflix’s “Love on the Spectrum”, where cast

member James goes on a date with Emma. Emma is also neurodivergent but has better

communication than James. James is often speaking quickly, sharing a lot of information,

struggling with eye contact and “info-dumping” on people he hangs out with. Emma is more

quiet, calm and reserved. While both are on the spectrum, Emma is unable to move forward with

dating James due to his autism characteristics because they are hard for her to accept.

When stigmatized, adults with autism are often discretable in their interactions with other

adults. Goffman described a “discreditable stigma” as an attribute which is not immediately

apparent to others and is concealable until disclosed. Many adults with autism are able to partake

in “masking” which is a process of hiding their autism symptoms. In the Netflix series “Love on

the Spectrum” autistic woman Kaelynn goes speed dating with neurotypical suitors. She does not

disclose her autism in the speed dating rounds and she matches with a neurotypical man and goes

on a second date. Their date is going well until Kaelynn discloses her autism. The date

stigmatizes Kaelynn by ending the date and calling things off with Kaelynn. Due to her

discredited stigma and disclosure, the date stigmatized her after meeting her the second time and

may have not done so if the autism was not disclosed.

In conclusion, adults on the autism spectrum are stigmatized based on the ways that

society perceives a blemish of character. Autistic adults struggle to fit in and find connections

with neurotypical members of society. As awareness and advocacy continue to increase, there is

still work to be done to reduce the stigma of autism in adults. Neurotypical adults can learn more

about how autism presents in their peers so that they can be more inclusive and compassionate.

This can lead to improved social interactions and understanding as well as increasing opportunity

in education and careers. Ultimately, by challenging stigma towards adults with autism, we can

strive towards creating a society where everyone, regardless of neurodiversity is given the

opportunity to thrive.